Someday, decades from now, when our children are all grown, they will ask us about the time. That bygone era, the one we do not speak of any more, in which there were other entertainments. Other heroes. Other stories. They will ask us what it was like to live in the time before all culture was The Avengers. Before Marvel, the company, gained sentience, and enslaved the human population, forcing us into endless toil on its moon-farms while the entertainment-chip implants in our wrists broadcast Avengers content onto our retinas 16 hours a day. Before the Bible was replaced with Captain America’s Pearls Of Wisdom. And with a tired sigh, a massaging of our calloused hands, and a croaking purr from our throats, we will whisper, “Eh, it was so-so.”

In related news, here is the new TV spot for Avengers: Age Of Ultron.

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