Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

Sorry, creeps, you won't find any zombie penis in Zack Snyder's Army Of The Dead

Army Of The Dead
Army Of The Dead
Photo: Netflix

After a few years of Zack Snyder’s DC universe, culminating in the four-hour Snyder Cut that still wasn’t enough for some fans, it’s time to let Snyder get back to his roots. With his upcoming Netflix movie, Army Of The Dead, Snyder returns to the genre that made him one of the biggest directors in Hollywood: the zombie movie. While Snyder fans are likely excited for the movie, another fanbase, the ones who really want to see some hardcore zombie nudity, will have to look elsewhere.

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Speaking to The Sunday Times, Snyder dished on the one sequence that had to be cut because it was just too dang hot, er, messed up and twisted. “We had a sequence where one of the male strippers had a huge penis with a bite taken out of it,” Snyder said. “We thought that was too much.”

That partially bitten zombie knob must really have been something if Zack Snyder thought it was too gross. After all, there’s a scene in Batman V. Superman: Dawn Of Justice in which Holly Hunter’s character drinks Lex Luthor’s urine. It’s hard to hear, but it looks like society isn’t ready to break some taboos.

Army Of The Dead is a zombie heist film set during the zombie apocalypse in which a group of mercenaries breaks into a Las Vegas casino. It stars Dave Bautista, Tig Notaro, Theo Rossi, but not a zombie stripper with a half-bitten penis. Supposedly, the director’s game plan was to have the audience on the side of the zombies. He said, “I wanted to endeavor, like any good villain, make the zombies as sympathetic as possible. I want you get you on Team Zombie.” Not sure if anyone told Snyder, but there are few things more sympathetic than a living dead dude with dental dents in his dong. Still, maybe we’ll get to see a zombie in a thong. That would be pretty cool. In the meantime, can we get “Release the Penis Cut” trending or what?