You guys. YOU GUYS. To paraphrase the estimable Mr. Humpty Hump, stop what you’re doin’, ’cuz I’m about to ruin—your productivity, that is. Not since the immortal clash between Eddie Vedder and Creed’s Scott Stapp has there been such a hotly anticipated grudge match, only this is literally a grudge match. The Grudge and The Ring were the two most successful exports of the early 2000s J-horror bonanza, especially after they were remade for American audiences. (They both also got equally terrible American sequels, but let’s stay positive today.) Frankly, it’s a little odd it’s taken this long for Japanese studio execs to have the same realization as American horror producers did 13 years ago, when Freddy Vs. Jason came out. But wait no more—ridiculous perfection, thy name is Sadako Vs. Kayako.
Even without English subtitles, the above trailer is a work of art. Pitting the ornery vengeful spirit from The Grudge against the stringy-haired VHS-based murderer from The Ring is the kind of absurdist magic that makes us all grateful the words “corporate synergy” exist. And about halfway through, it even starts using the same type of cornball nü-metal Ronny Yu put to such excellent effect in the Krueger-meets-Voorhees matchup.
It looks like Sadako Vs. Kayako comes out June 16 in Japan, but it can’t get to the States soon enough. We’re already planning the official A.V. Club viewing party, but you have to RSVP exactly seven days beforehand. Because once we’ve seen the movie, we can die.