The '90s have sorely lacked teen sex comedies. Sure, the occasional film has toyed with the conventions of the genre, like Clueless, but there hasn't been an orthodox, full-scale, major-studio teen sex comedy since a pre-stardom Ethan Hawke essayed the role of a lovelorn virgin in 1991's Mystery Date. Which is why The Trojan War is such a breath of fresh air. Wonderfully, unapologetically old-school, The Trojan War lovingly and earnestly trots out all the conventions of the genre. Good-looking virgin desperately in love with popular cheerleader? Check. Cheerleader going out with thuggish jock? Check. Protagonist's gorgeous but vaguely tomboyish best friend hopelessly in love with him? Check. Symbolic destruction of expensive, phallic sports car? Check. Overtly racist scene involving white, affluent protagonist getting lost in ghetto neighborhood and menaced by entire Hispanic community? Check. Scene in which protagonist attempts to buy condom, but is embarrassed by clerk loudly requesting price check? Check. Climactic party sequence during which protagonist realizes he really is in love with best friend? Check. Scene in which jock gets come-uppance via a wild dog's attack on his crotch? Check. The unironic affection the film has for its forebears is infectious. By all means, rent The Trojan War: It may be formulaic, predictable and as substantial as a Little Debbie snack cake, but as a loving, inane throwback to the golden age of the Brat Pack and the two Coreys, it's irresistible.